Friday, September 26, 2008

If you went to the University of Idaho (motto: potato ergo sum), I'm sure you might be a wonderful person, but you're probably not a terribly intelligent person. Located in Moscow, Idaho, a town that according to Google does not have a single halal restaurant, University of Idaho alumni have taken a beating of late. They include Senator Larry Craig of "I have a wide stance" fame, St. Louis Rams coach Scott Linehan, whose Rams have lost 38-3, 41-13 and 37-13 this season, and, of course, Ms. Sarah Palin.

Palin, if she were to apply for my job, might well need to present her transcripts from such institutions as Hawaii Pacific College (guessed motto: hula ergo sum; actual motto: Holomua Me Ka Oiaio), North Idaho College (actual motto: Changing Lives Everyday) and Matanuska-Susitna College (possible motto: books are not sold on campus), in addition to the University of Idaho. There is, apparently, a division of the Korean goverment that verifies the university degrees of foreign teachers. This process presumably applies to schools like Harvard or Princeton, as well as Indiana of Pennsylvania or Miami of Ohio. I imagine they'd blow through the year's budget on Palin.

Palin is astonishingly dumb. Here is an interview with the ageless Katie Couric. Thoughtful readers will notice that I saw Couric's washroom and office in April.

It goes something like this:

Couric: Do you support Henry Paulson's Troubled Asset Relief Program?
Palin: Only with the right amendments. But what I think is really interesting is that Americans are waiting to see what John McCain will do, but no one cares what Barack Obama will do or say on this matter.
Editorial comment: many people care what Kim Jong Il will do next, or when he'll next be seen in public. No one cares what Norwegian Prime Minister Jens Stoltenberg will do. According to Palin's logic, this makes Kim the better leader.
Couric: But polls show that more Americans support Obama.
Palin: I don't care about polls, I care about track record (even though I just said that Americans are holding their breaths to see what McCain is going to do).

Couric: You've said that "John McCain will reform the way Wall Street does business". Can you give us some examples of what he's done in 26 years?
Palin: I'll try to find some and I'll bring them to ya.

No, really, that's what she said. "I'll bring them to ya." She has an IQ of about 75. If you vote Republican, you're probably mildly retarded.

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